Confession

Okay, I just put this in a comment so I might as well 'fess up to it here. My major impetus for doing this cleanse is to make my mother happy. Yes, me pooping doing a cleanse will make my mother happy.

That is all.

Day One

Pill count:

• 1 Advanced Cleanse I
• 3 OilSmart (Organic Flax, Borage and Cold Water Fish Oils)
• 1 Extended release B¹²

Okay, so far I've had one bowel movement...which won't be posted here for two reasons:

1. it happened so soon after the first pill that I don't think I can legitimately consider it to be part of this endeavor
2. I forgot to take my camera with me into the bathroom

Justification is my best friend.

That said, I decided not to start off with the fiber today because I want to ease into things. Fiber seems like a good way to start off day two. Yes, day two will be Fiber Day. At this point, I'm considering keeping track of my daily sins as well because, quite frankly, I'm only half-assing this thing. I've taken their lifestyle and diet suggestions as just that: suggestions which I can easily discard. I mean, if they really thought that I should follow them, they would use a word other than "suggestion", right? For instance, they could have called them mandates or requirements. That said, I'm off to drink a ton of H₂O which is the one suggestion that I've decided to take to heart. Tomorrow, there should be pictures of poo...knock on log.

The Day Before

Tomorrow, I will start something that I've never done before... a cleanse. Yeah, yeah, yeah...everyone's doing it...blah, blah, blah...it will make me healthier (or so says the aforementioned "everyone")... yadda, yadda, yadda...better skin...whatever--I'm in it for the pooping.

It's not that I have any problems with the BM...well, no real problem. It's just that I'm pretty sure they could be better. It seems like something hasn't really made its way out. So I'm doing a cleanse...which I'll be chronicling here. Why? Well, for the most part, it's so I can keep track of what I've been doing, how it's working out, and what I should be doing. Yes, I really need this crutch despite the fact that I'm using the pre-formulized cleanse pictured below. It's no more stressful than having to take one type of pill in the morning, and then another in the evening. I, however, am perfectly aware of my limitations and the likelihood that I'll screw it up.